Best funny surgeon jokes and jokes from the operating room.
Operating room. The surgeon says to the student trainee:
- I know, my young friend, that this is your first operation. Of course, it will not go very well, but when you open the patient, do not press too hard on the scalpel, you can damage the table.
The old surgeon instructs the young one:
- So, colleague, today you have your first independent surgery. Be extremely focused and attentive. Otherwise, you can cut your finger.
The nurse advises the patient:
- If you want to thank the doctor, do it before the operation, otherwise it may be too late after.
The young man, regaining consciousness after the operation, asks:
- What happened to me?
- You were in a car accident and you were operated on.
- So I'm in the hospital?
- Yes, for the most part.
The patient is recovering after a surgery.
- Thank God it's all over!
- Don't be self-confident, - said the neighbor on the right. - They forgot the napkin in me and had to cut again.
- And they cut me again, too, - said the neighbor on the left, - they forgot some kind of tool there.
At this time, the head of the surgeon who had just operated appeared at the door of the ward.
- Has anyone seen my hat? - he asked.
The surgeon says to the patient who is being prepared for surgery:
- You have absolutely nothing to fear. This is my sixteenth operation, I have to finally suceed someday!
At the surgeon.
- Nurse, what do we have today?
- Two mild cases: car accident, work injury. And one heavy one - the husband who refused to wash the dishes
A mother is waiting outside the operating room while her son is being operated on. The door of the operating room opens and a tired surgeon comes out. The mother asks:
- Well, how was the operation?
- Operation?! Actually, I thought I was doing an autopsy.
- Doctor, did you sew my head on after the plane crash?
- Yes, it was me. Any complaints about the quality of the seam?
- No, doctor, the seam is good, but it's not my head ...
Two doctors talk:
- What can you say about this patient?
- I'm shocked! I had two surgeries on him and he's still alive!