Our Jokes:
Office Jokes
Funny Workplace Humor About Bosses, Coworkers, and 9-to-5 Job
Office life comes with deadlines, meetings, awkward conversations, and the daily grind of the 9-to-5.
These office jokes capture the humor hidden in workplace relationships — from bosses and coworkers to emails, meetings, and office politics. Relatable, clever, and sometimes painfully accurate, this collection of workplace humor is perfect for anyone who’s ever survived a long meeting, questionable management decisions, or another “quick call” that wasn’t quick at all.
There was once a sales manager. He went to search for a job, sent resumes and all. Finally he gets an interview at a company with the CEO. They had the interview for 6 hours straight. The CEO is all sweaty, the sales manager asked for water tree times, but they still couldn't come to an agreement.
They started with $200 dollars a week and now they are up to $2,500. Then there is commission, and bonuses, and gym membership, company mobile, lunches with clients, insurance, vacations, travel allowances, a company car, a laptop, the sales manager knocked out a bunch of everything. As a result, the general director surrendered, he fulfilled all the conditions. Everything the manager asked for, he gave.
The manager started to work, and in the first month he tripled sales, then tenfold, then a hundred times, then he sold everything in the office, including furniture, stationery, a secretary - to the sauna, a customer database - to competitors, and the boss himself - to the tax agency.
Because it was, damn, a very good sales manager.
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Why did you leave your previous job?
- Due to tiredness.
- What kind of tiredness?
- I do not know. They just told me that everyone was very tired of me ...
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Company boss tell his secretary:
- You're fired!
- Why, boss? I respect and love you.
- During respect, you gave me something that I managed to share with my wife!
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A young man, in love with a pretty secretary, was having a flirtatious conversation with her, when suddenly the company owner entered the office.
- So, where did we stop? - the young man asked with a businesslike tone.
The girl did not notice the arrival of the owner.
- You spoke of our future, dear, - she replied, - Of our house, of the comfort of the living room by the firelight, and how you would like to beat our old monkey's face.
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The director of the factory, checking the printed report, asks the secretary how many zeros million has.
- Six zeros, - the secretary says.
- And half a million?
- Three, - she answers.
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- Who told you, - the boss yells at the secretary, - that if I kissed you a couple of times and patted your ass, this gives you the right to skimp on official duties and do nothing at work?
- My lawyer, sir, - smiles the secretary.
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Arriving from a business trip, a fills an expense report. In one of the columns of the report he writes:
"Women - 500 dollars"
The chief accountant does not approve the report: arguing that such an expense item is not provided.
- The next time you can write off this amount for some work type, such as hammering nails.
The next advance report looked like this:
"Hamming nails - 500 dollars. Hammer repair - 5000 dollars".
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Why are you so tired and sad?
- Work ... Work ... Morning and evening ... All day work ...
- How long have you been working like this?
- I start tomorrow...
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Employees of one company drank quietly at work when the boss is not around. And they chew a special gum so that alcohol did not leave behind a smell. After a while, the boss calls drunkards to him.
- If you already drink - he tells them - then drink alcohol with a smell. Let the visitors think they are dealing with drunk professionals rather than sober idiots!
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In the HR department:
- Do you have any references from your previous job?
- Yes, it was there where they recommended me to look for another job.
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