Our Jokes:
Politics Joke
Funny Jokes About Governments, Politicians, and World Leaders
Politics affects everyone — and that’s exactly why it has always been a source of humor.
These politics jokes take a lighthearted look at governments, politicians, international relations, and the strange moments that happen on the world stage. Whether you follow global affairs closely or just enjoy a good laugh about power, bureaucracy, and diplomacy, these jokes are meant to entertain without taking sides.
Forensic science is a science that studies failed criminals. Well, those who got caught.
The science that studies successful criminals is called political science.
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I think I could work for the UN...
...I'm constantly resentful and preoccupied, and I don't do shit
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In chess, white and black pieces are the worst enemies, but those who move the pieces are usually good friends.
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If horses are not to be changed at the crossing, and at the same time the horse is the decision maker, then the whole life of the country will be an eternal and endless crossing.
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A parliament member, a worker, and an immigrant are sitting at a table with 20 cakes. The parliament member eats 19 cakes, after which he says:
- Worker, be vigilant, the immigrant wants to take your cake!
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The government has long learned that it is easiest to take money from the poor.
Of course, the poor have little money - but there are A LOT of poor ...
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A baby was born. The family is touched and everyone predicts his future.
Mother: He will grow up to become a scientist. What smart little eyes.
Father: No, the military! Look, how strong!
The turn has come to the grandmother:
- He will be politician!
- Why?
- Look, all in shit, but how he holds his head!
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Soviet Union. At night in a hotel room, two neighbors do not let the third one fall asleep: they tell political jokes. He scares them:
- Here everything is taped!
They laugh and continue. Then he goes out and asks the hotel servant to bring three cups of coffee to the room in exactly five minutes. He comes back, leans over to the ashtray and says:
- Comrade Major! Three coffees in the room please! The servant brings coffee. The shocked narrators go to bed. The next morning the joker wakes up alone. He asks the duty officer where his neighbors are. He answers:
- At night, the KGB officers came and took them away!
Why didn't they take me away?
- Yes, their major said: "I really loved his joke with the ashtray!"
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A new prime minister of old views talks to the nation for the first time:
The cyclist is a real disaster for the economy. He does not buy a car and does not take a car loan against it. Doesn't buy gasoline. Does not use the services of repair shops and car washes. Does not insure "civil liability". Does not use paid parking. Not obese. Yes, and healthy, damn it! Healthy people are not needed for the economy. They don't buy drugs. They don't go to private doctors. They do not increase the country's GDP.
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Battery advertisement: "Buy 4 batteries, you get 4 more for free."
Political advertisement: "Electing the president for 4 years, you get 4 more as a gift."
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