Our Jokes:
Politics Joke
Funny Jokes About Governments, Politicians, and World Leaders
Politics affects everyone — and that’s exactly why it has always been a source of humor.
These politics jokes take a lighthearted look at governments, politicians, international relations, and the strange moments that happen on the world stage. Whether you follow global affairs closely or just enjoy a good laugh about power, bureaucracy, and diplomacy, these jokes are meant to entertain without taking sides.
A man comes up to the star singer after the concert. He introduces himself as a fan and asks:
- Tell me, you are so famous, why are your halls half empty?
- How are they half empty? We sell twice as many tickets as the hall can accommodate. And resellers resell tickets for another 200 dollars before the concert.
- OK then. But there are never any records of yours in stores ...
- How are you saying this? I'm the best-selling singer in the country! I already have two gold and three platinum records, pirated copies on every corner! What kind of fan are you if you are not so attentive!
- Yes, I'm not really a fan. I'm from the tax department...
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At a meeting of the English Parliament, the Speaker is asked:
- Sir, does protocol allow me to call Lord Chesterton a fat and dirty pig?
- Sir, protocol does not allow you to call Lord Chesterton a fat and dirty pig.
- In that case, I will refrain from calling Lord Chesterton a fat and dirty pig.
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Cemetery, funeral. On the pedestal - a coffin, wreaths. A speech is heard:
- Today we are burying an outstanding politician and a crystal-clear honest person...
This is heard by two passers-by. One asks the other:
- I wonder why in the same coffin?
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Two friends watch TV in a bar:
- Don't you think the authorities are taking us for idiots?
- Furthermore! I don't think they're wrong.
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The man died and ended up in the next world.
Looks, the devil is selling cutlets in a shop. The cutlets are all the same, but the prices are different. The cheapest for 1 dollar, and the most expensive for 100 dollars.
The man asks why such prices.
The devil explains:
- These, for a dollar, are made from the brains of deceased mathematicians, and those, the most expensive ones, for 100 dollars each, are made from the brains of officials.
Man:
- I don't understand. The brains of mathematicians are the best. Why are cutlets from them the cheapest?
The devil explains:
- Do you know how many officials have to die in order to get enough brains for one cutlet?
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Russian News: "Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin announced that he does not want to be president anymore. The coronation is set for Tuesday."
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During another skirmish in Congress, a fat and tall senator shouted to his opponent - a small and thin man:
- I can swallow you and not even feel that I ate something.
- In that case, - he replied, - you will have more brains in your stomach than ever had in your head.
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They say you were at the campaign meeting when our candidate Wales spoke. Is it true that he was rewarded with applause every now and then?
- Oh yes of course! There was an explosion of applause every time he brushed a rotten egg out of his face after another well-aimed hit.
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The Prime Minister addresses the nation:
- Before I came to power, our country was on the brink of an abyss. And I want it to take a step forward now.
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Which hell is better - capitalist or socialist?
- Of course, the socialist one - either there are no matches, then there are interruptions in fuel, then the boiler will be put in for repairs, then the devils have a party meeting.
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