School Jokes

Funny Classroom Jokes About Teachers, Students, and School Life

These school jokes highlight the funny side of everyday school life, capturing humorous situations between teachers and students that everyone can relate to. Clean, lighthearted, and full of charm, this collection of classroom humor is perfect for students, teachers, parents, and anyone who remembers what it was like sitting in class waiting for the bell to ring.

The teacher asks little Johnny:
- What is your jacket made of?
- From cloth.
- Right. What is cloth made from?
- Wool!
- Well done! And who gives us wool?
- Sheep.
- Clever! So what animal gave you the jacket?
- My dad.

During a lesson in school, one student correctly answered all the teacher's questions, which provoked a classmate to a contemptuous comment:" "Nerd!""
The teacher made a remark to her that it would not hurt to be more respectful towards, perhaps, a future employer.
To which the guy added: "This is unlikely. I don't plan on becoming a pimp".

The teacher asks the students:
- Which person you encountered during the school year shocked you the most?
Pupils start to answer:
- Me - Napoleon.
- Me - Hannibal.
- Me - Julius Caesar.
- And me, - said Little Johnny, - my father, when he saw the report card for the first half of the year.

Little Bart comes home from school:
- Mom, today the principal of the school asked if I have brothers and sisters, and I said that I am the only child in the family.
- And what did she say?
- She said, - "Thank God!"

Son comes home from school and tells his dad:
- Dad, there is a parent meeting at school today, but only for the narrowest circle.
- For the narrowest circle? How to understand it?
- There will be only the principal and you.

"The teacher told the students to bring medical instruments to school, whatever kids can get:
scissors, tweezers, syringes...
Bart brought a breathing apparatus. The teacher asks:
- Bart, where did you get it?
- From my grandfather, - Bart replies.
- What did he tell you?
- Hupp-hup-hup...

There is a biology lesson in the eighth grade. Bart misbehaves and does not listen.
The teacher says:
- Bart, look carefully at me, otherwise you won't have any idea about the monkey.

The teacher asked the pupils at school to write an essay on the topic: "If I were the director of the company ..."
Everyone diligently writes, and only Bart looks out the window.
- Why don't you write? - the teacher asks.
- I'm waiting for my secretary!

The teacher asks the children who their parents work for. Peter says:
- And my mother is a prostitute!
- Oh, how dare you, go to the principal and tell about your act! The principal was a man. After a while, little Peter enters the classroom and hides something behind his back.
- Well, what did the principal say?
- Mr. Brown said that all professions are important, gave a bag of sweets, and wrote down our home address.

Teacher in the classroom:
- Peter, why are you late again?
Peter responds:
-Well, Mrs. Thompson, you said yourself that it's never too late to learn.